Category: Success
Are You Living Your Values?
by Marguerite Ham If we live in a way that conflicts with our deep internal values, we can’t help but be unhappy, though we might not consciously know why. In the midst of our busy life, we don’t often stop to think about our personal value system. The list below will help you discover the values that have deep meaning to you. You can use these values to review your own personal value system which you can keep handy to help you assess new situations or re-assess any situation that makes you uneasy. Often, when we are feeling strangely uncomfortable or upset in a situation, conversation or circumstance, it is because the situation is pushing against our value system. What Are Your Values? Could you sit down and list your top five deep personal values? If not, this is a great exercise. To build your value list, read through this list of values and check any that have great importance to you. Don’t worry about dictionary definitions or what other people think; you know what these words represent to you, and that’s what is important. The words you check should represent principles you hold dear or values you strive to …
Leaders Set the Example
A friend and client, John Horan, forwarded a Harvard Business Review article to me: Leading Teams: If You Multitask During Meetings, Your Team Will, Too. I found it interesting and right on! I think we each occasionally find ourselves guilty of the sins noted in this article and setting a bad example for our team. Take a few minutes to read the article. Then think about it, and then find ways to take small steps and make small changes to set the example for your co-workers, direct reports and peers! Here are some highlights from the article: The more senior (years and position) we become in an organization, the more influence and impact we have on others – the ripple effect amplifies! Self-awareness comes into play – take time to reflect and ask yourself the questions below – be honest! Common Examples that Have a Negative Ripple Effect Working after hours – I am guilty of this one! (Note: I used the delayed delivery option so this would go out on Monday afternoon instead of Sunday night!) Sending emails at night is a problem (study in the article looked at Sunday evening – very interesting research, check it out!) Most …
Trust and Team Building
The post before last was about finding balance in your life, based on information from the book Breaking the Trust Barrier, by JV Venable. If you recall, Venable was a commander and demonstration leader of the Thunderbirds, the USAF’s elite demonstration team. In addition to balance, the author addresses building teams – and the commander of a team whose slightest mistake can cause death and disaster knows something about building strong, tight, effective, high-functioning teams! Critical characteristics of a high-functioning team There are three key components to a great team: Trust Loyalty Commitment Trust: The willingness to put yourself or your team at risk with the belief that another will follow through with a task, in a role, or with a mission. Loyalty: Cohesion within a relationship – the kind that can be built only on the foundation of commitment. It is fostered by a leader’s willingness to go the distance to support his/her team without the expectation that they will respond in kind. Commitment: The demonstrated will to deliver for the people around you. Building a Team No matter how willing people are to work together, deep feelings like trust, loyalty, and commitment take time to develop. Steven Covey …
Crucial conversations with the C Style
Today, we wrap up the series of communication tips based on DISC styles with hints for strong C’s, the Mr. Spocks of the office. Even if you don’t need it right now, you can bookmark the first article, which contains links to the others, and keep it for reference when you do run into a thorny communication problem with another style. Was this helpful to you? Please comment or drop me a line if you liked it or want to see more on this topic. Feedback is always helpful! If you’re a high C, here’s how you relate… …to a high D: People with the D style like to get right to the point. They want things to happen quickly and don’t want to spend a lot of time dwelling on specifics. You’re more likely to be careful and systematic, taking the time to point out logical objections. You may find their blunt, forceful approach to be pushy or reckless. They may see your persistent questions as a barrier to progress. Strategies: Talk about big picture and bottom line rather than details Show them that you can move quickly when necessary Voice concerns, but avoid saying something “won’t work”. When …
Crucial Conversations with the S Style
If you’re a high S, here’s how you relate… …to a high D: People with the D style like to get right to the point. They’re willing to be straightforward and even blunt at times in the interest of making rapid process. You’re more likely to be tactful and soft-spoken, so they may dominate discussions with you. While they may not see this as a problem, you probably feel somewhat intimidated by them. At the same time, they may become frustrated by your unwillingness to speak up. Strategies: When trying to connect, avoid appearing too hesitant and indecisive. Remember that they appreciate a direct approach, so don’t be afraid to tell them what you’re thinking. Be prepared for their candor. When solving problems, avoid appearing hesitant or indecisive. Be willing to take a stronger stance. Speak up to make sure you have a voice in the solution. If things get tense, avoid giving in to their demands just to regain harmony. Know that hiding your true feelings could be more harmful than speaking candidly. Be aware that they will reciprocate when you challenge them, and they may be more aggressive. …to an I style: People with the Ii’ style are …
Crucial Conversations with the I style
If you’re a high I, here’s how you relate… …to a high D: People with the D style like to get right to the point. They’re probably straightforward and even blunt at times, while you’re more likely to spend time building friendly relationships rather than focusing quickly on the bottom line. As a result, they may become frustrated if you spend too much time socializing, and you may sometimes take their frankness personally. Strategies: When trying to connect, minimize small talk, and dig right into business. Avoid taking it personally when they ignore efforts to be friendly and go directly to topics at hand. Show them how your people-focused approach can bring bottom-line results. When solving problems, avoid emphasizing other people’s feelings at the expense of finding workable answers. Refrain from suggesting unrealistically positive scenarios Take time to consider whether your speedy decisions might cause more problems in the future. If things get tense, don’t brush problems under the rug just to keep things friendly. Avoid interpreting their directness as a personal attack. State your points objectively rather than lashing out emotionally. …to another I style: People with the ‘I’ style thrive in high-energy settings where they can work collaboratively …
Crucial Conversations with the D Style
If you’re a high D, here’s how you relate to each of the styles: …to another high D: People with the D style like to get right to the point. They want things to happen quickly and don’t want to spend a lot of time dwelling on specifics. Because both of you tend to be straightforward, you may try to clear the air and get things moving. But since you share a strong-willed and competitive nature, you may overwhelm each other’s ideas with your own opinions. As a result, neither of you may listen to what the other has to say. Each and every person has a sacred point of view and deserves to be heard and understood. Strategies: Focus on dialogue rather than talking over each other. Don’t push back too forcefully if they get assertive. Give them time to present their case without interrupting before offering your own ideas. When solving problems, don’t be so insistent on your own solutions that you dismiss the merit of their ideas. Remember that the goal is to solve problems, not to win as an individual. Be willing to compromise at times. If things get tense, address the situation directly but avoid …